Dear Cristina,

I had a reading with you once and it proved to be correct. Right now I am trying to improve my life by cleaning away the cobwebs and making new ways and opening new doors -- a new job, new people, and even a new place to live. Yet the burden of past relationships is hanging over me. I see the pattern in my relationships and the recent ones all ended in breakups.

I am not sure why men decided to move on when it was a question of commitment and becoming exclusive and closed the door. I am not burdensome and not pessimist; on the contrary, I'm smart, beautiful, full of ideas and plans. I talk a lot though, yet I talked smart. I am cultured and very well educated. Perhaps I am too much for those men, or possibly made the wrong choices? How can I introduce equilibrium in my personal life and create a good healthy relationship and family? How do I break from the patterns? Right now I am brooding over a breakup with a nice man that was unexpected though I suspected there was something elusive and not transparent in him. Please give me your advice. It feels like there is something inside of me which pushes me forward and often pushes others out of my life. It is very sad and strange.

Thank you --Marina

Blessings, Marina.

Thank you for your question and for remembering our chat. First of all you are on the right track with all the changes and self-improvements you are making. It is normal to feel the cobwebs of the past all around you. It is normal to reflect on what happened in the past -- it's your path to wisdom, to enlightenment. You know that you can no longer make the same mistakes or attract the same kind of men. You may fear you'll fall into the same patterns but you won't. You are too smart for that.

First, you recognize there are patterns of behavior within yourself and you already know that these men who were in your life before were simply the wrong ones. They are practice and part of your spiritual journey into learning more about yourself. You know more about yourself now than you ever did. Not only are you smart, witty and beautiful, you are now wiser. Now, where do you go from here? That is the real question. First you stop brooding. I feel you probably already have. But stop thinking of what may have been and what was in the past, as it no longer serves you, and focus on the present moment. You have a lot going for you in so many ways, and that is where your attention needs to be. You wish to know why he left? Because he wasn't capable of the love you seek. Simple as that. Focus on the love you have in your life now, even if it's from a relative, friend, or pet. Forget about looking. I know you've stopped looking, but stop thinking about it too. The right one will find you. Your life has just begun!

Much love and light --Cristina