Getting over someone you never dated can be just as challenging and heart-wrenching as moving on from an official relationship. It could be someone who doesn’t know you’re crushing on them or they just don’t feel the same way. It could be a situationship that doesn’t turn into an official relationship, or it could just be the wrong timing for the two of you.
No matter the circumstances, this unique form of emotional turmoil often leaves you feeling confused, frustrated, and stuck. At some point in life, most people can admit they’ve felt this unrequited love that goes unfulfilled, leaving you with lingering “what-ifs” after building up an illusion in your head and your heart. But don't worry—it's entirely possible to move past these emotions and find happiness again. Let's explore some friendly, practical steps to help you get over someone you never actually dated.
What is unrequited love?
Unrequited love, where your feelings for someone aren't reciprocated, can be a particularly tough nut to crack. It's like having a recurring and euphoric dream that never comes to fruition. You might feel a deep connection with this person, imagining a future together or analyzing every interaction for hidden meanings. But when those feelings aren't returned, it can leave you feeling vulnerable and heartbroken.
If you’ve ever opened up to someone about what you’re going through and been shut down with some very harsh truths about your reality and relationship status, know that it is not so black and white, and you are entitled to these feelings. It's important to recognize and validate your emotions. Your feelings are real, and grieving "what could have been" is part of the healing process. Allow yourself the space to experience these emotions without judgment. Accept that unrequited love doesn’t diminish your worth—it’s a natural human experience that many people go through.
Sometimes, it is hard for people who know you to have empathy in this situation. They may see it as you lacking self-confidence and making irresponsible decisions in your love life. In these circumstances, seeking love help from Kasamba’s experts can give you the answers and guidance you need.
Acknowledge Your Feelings
First and foremost, allow yourself to acknowledge all the emotions you're experiencing. Whether it's sadness, anger, or confusion, these feelings are valid. Bottling things up in the moment will only prevent you from moving on. Writing your thoughts down in a journal can be extremely beneficial. Acknowledging your emotions is the first step toward understanding and eventually overcoming them.
Understand What You're Going Through
In many ways, mourning the loss of an unrequited love or a crush can be similar to going through a breakup. There’s an element of loss—loss of hope, loss of potential, and loss of imagined futures. Understanding the psychology behind why you feel this way can give you a clearer perspective. Chatting with a friend or family member or seeking therapy can provide support and guidance as you go through this process. Overall, recognizing that your feelings are normal can make it easier to confront them.
Limit Contact and Exposure
It might be tempting to keep checking their social media or maintain casual contact, but this can prolong the emotional pain. Now is the time to focus on yourself and your healing, rather than acting like everything is fine and you can still be friends. Try to limit your exposure to them both online and offline as constant reminders of their presence can reopen wounds and hinder your healing process. This doesn't mean you need to be rude or cut them out of your life completely, but establishing some boundaries will be essential for your healing process. It doesn’t mean to say things can’t change in the future, but at this time, removing all forms of contact will stop you from being reminded about them every time you look at your phone.
Focus on Yourself
Spend this time focusing on self-love and self-improvement. Engage in hobbies that make you happy, whether it’s painting, hiking, or reading a good book. Exercise, listen to your favorite music, or take up a new skill. Channel your energy into healthy outlets and focus on activities that bring you joy. You'll find that your mind will begin to shift from the object of your unrequited affection to more fulfilling endeavors.
Seek Support
Don't isolate yourself during this period. Your friends and family can offer emotional support, remind you of your worth, and perhaps a different perspective on the situation. Sometimes, talking about your feelings with someone you trust can help you process them more effectively. They might even share their own experiences, which can provide comfort and practical advice.
Reflect on the Situation Objectively
It can help to take a step back and reflect on why the relationship didn't progress in the first place. Maybe the timing wasn't right, or perhaps your lifestyles or values don’t align. It’s common to idealize the person, especially if you have strong feelings, so it’s important to keep reminding yourself that this person is not perfect and venturing into a real relationship with them would have its own set of issues.
Understanding the reasons behind the unattainability of the relationship can provide relief and help you focus on what you truly need and deserve in a romantic partner. When you do decide to go back into dating, these lessons and experiences will help you find the right person and identify any red flags from the outset.
Create New Memories
One effective way to move on is by creating new experiences and memories. Travel to a new place, try a new activity or meet new people. By enriching your life with new experiences, you're not only distancing yourself from the past but also opening doors to future happiness. Now is the time to focus on you, and doing things that make you happy will give you a whole different kind of infectious energy and glow!
Consider Professional Help
If your feelings are overwhelming and you find it difficult to move on, consider seeking guidance from a therapist or advisor. Professional help can offer valuable tools and strategies for managing your emotions and may provide insights you hadn't considered. Kasamba’s love psychics have helped countless people navigate similar situations to yours and can provide helpful answers to guide you on the right path.
Practice Mindfulness and Meditation
Mindfulness and meditation can be extremely helpful in managing emotional pain. These practices teach you to live in the moment and observe your feelings without judgment. Guided meditation apps can make it easy to get started if you’re new to mindfulness.
Let Go of What Might Have Been
One of the toughest parts about getting over someone you never dated is letting go of the "what if" scenarios. While it's natural to imagine what might have been, it's important to bring your focus back to reality. Your idea of what “might have been” could be extremely different from what would have unfolded had you crossed that line. Accepting that it wasn’t meant to be is an essential step toward moving on.
Be Kind to Yourself
Above all, be gentle and kind to yourself. Healing from unrequited love is not a linear process, and it takes time. It's perfectly okay to feel hurt and give yourself space to heal. Avoid self-blame or harsh criticism. Instead, practice self-compassion and allow yourself to grieve the loss at your own pace.
Embrace the Possibilities Ahead
Remember, the end of one chapter always marks the beginning of another. While it may be difficult to see it now, the future holds countless opportunities for you—new connections, new experiences, and new loves. Embrace the unpredictability of life and the exciting possibilities that lie ahead.
Getting over someone you never dated is undoubtedly challenging but not impossible. By acknowledging your feelings, seeking support, and focusing on self-care, you'll find that the pain will gradually lessen, and you'll be able to move on. So take a deep breath, be kind to yourself, and remember that brighter days are just around the corner.
About Janice Howard
Janice Howard is based in Oklahoma, USA. With years of experience researching all things spiritual , including divination tools such as Tarot, Numerology, and Psychic connections, Janice regards herself as a spiritual activist. During her spare time, she practices yoga, writes, and teaches mind, body, and soul connections at the local recreation centers.
Skills : Master of spirituality / Spiritual writer based in Oklahoma, USA / Spiritual activist
Skills : Master of spirituality / Spiritual writer based in Oklahoma, USA / Spiritual activist